I haven't posted much on here in a while. I have, however, been busy at my other blogs, one of which is Our Irish Manor. In between sicknesses and working on the house, we attempt to keep up with school. We've also had a couple birthdays around here, and my 31st is just around the corner!
Hard to believe that I will have 5 kids in just a few more months. When we started our family, I never thought that I would want a big family, but I feel like this is right for us. It may be that God's plan for us stops at 5, but who am I to say?
I am, however, feeling rather overwhelmed by all the commitments outside of our home. I feel spread far too thin, trying to keep up with even a few weekly activities. Church, grocery shopping, lessons, helping other people. I love each of these, but I feel more and more strongly that my place is at home, taking care of what I have now (namely my husband, children and finishing our house!) and these outside things make it hard to keep up with my daily responsibilities. Between preparing for a baby and trying to get unpacked (never mind the remodel!), I am booked!
A blog that I have been enjoying for its practical advice on homeschooling and its positive perspective on mothering and raising a large family (do we qualify with only 4?) has a great post on getting things back into perspective as women of the home. You can read it here. It is nice to hear someone say that even those things that are good and help us spiritually or even our children's education, can get in the way of us doing our most important work - making a home for our family!
What I love most about being a stay at home, homeschooling mom is having my family around me in a place where we are all comfortable. It is our oasis in a broken world, our resting place. I have mentioned before that I don't deal with clutter well. I get upset and irritable, often taking it out on those around me. It doesn't make it any easier to put things in order when we are constantly preparing to leave the house (which is a TASK!) for errands or activities. I may just take a sabbatical from all outside activities for a while... just until I can get to a place at home where the peace has returned and my family is really being taken care of.
I know that this if foreign to so many "churched" people. We are told that when things get tough, its because we aren't spending enough time at church with God! We are told that having our kids in extra activities helps them become "well rounded adults!" I don't disagree completely with all of these, but a cluttered or chaotic home that is neglected will not be fixed by prayer alone! God will not clean or organize my house while I am gone; that is my job! He may provide the food, but I am the one who will assemble it into healthy meals for my family and that takes preparation! I think the benefits of taking a step back and getting refocused will make far more of an impact, in both the immediate and distant future, than the damage done by not being at church for a hand full of weeks. Am I wrong?
I could use some feedback on this one.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Monday, January 3, 2011
Wait, you what?!
My oldest son asked me for a cell phone today. He's 8.
Then this evening, he informed me that when he gets a laptop, he will have a facebook account. Yikes.
I thought homeschooling was going to insulate us from all this! I suppose it has postponed it, but it looks like the American culture is still sneaking in....
Then this evening, he informed me that when he gets a laptop, he will have a facebook account. Yikes.
I thought homeschooling was going to insulate us from all this! I suppose it has postponed it, but it looks like the American culture is still sneaking in....
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Surprise!
I would like to announce that we (our family) are expecting a new baby! I am pregnant and due in May of 2011! I waited a long time to tell anyone, even my husband. He didn't find out until I was 10 weeks and I probably would have waited longer had he not asked me specifically! I am thrilled to be having another baby. It does seem like it is coming right on the heels of the last one, but our youngest son and this baby will be 20 months apart, the same spacing as our oldest 2 sons. Thankfully, I have lots of helpers around now!
Before I start the resolutions for the new year, I want to review what has been accomplished in my life. Not necessarily by me but for me with God's guidance and mercy:
I have learned to go to bed at a decent hour so that I can be ready for the next day. This has taken years for me to learn and only came when the needs of this last baby demanded it.
I made it to 7 months of nursing! That beats the last record for me :)
We saved up and bought a house!
I have continued my journey in better nutrition for my family and have found a happy medium, though the journey is not over.
I have learned to say "No" to too many extra, outside the home things that take me away from my duties and peace here.
I am learning to embrace my physical appearance, thanks to the blessing of having a husband who asked me not to diet anymore. I love that man! I think he might like me too....
We gave more.
I have worked hard at loving those I may not like. I know I have more of me to submit to the Lord in that, more parts of my heart that need to be repaired.
I have looked hard at my motivations for doing things, be they vain or righteous.
I know there are so many more that I am over looking or forgetting completely. Sadly, I did not get my hunting license or passport, but....
On to the new years resolutions! These are in random order, and I will probably add to the list since I have only thought of a few things to work on this year. Remodeling a house and having a baby sure take up the energy I would normally have for overhauling other areas of my life!
1. Get back on track for homeschool. Holiday break is over, starting tomorrow!
2. Stop drinking coffee- it makes me grouchy and irritable and its bad for the baby. Yes, even though it is half caff! (Day 2 -So far, so good with this one. I put away the coffee today and I will put away the pot tomorrow) Coffee will be a fun treat on occasion instead of a crutch!
3. Do TTapp exercises 3 times a week.
4. Spend more time with each child individually. Mommy day once a month?
5. Lose my temper less and speak more gently to those around me, specifically my children and husband!
6. Love and praise my family more.
7. Rest more! I discovered, while sick the last 2 weeks, that I need more rest than I thought previously. Delegate chores that stress to other people when possible.
8. Find solutions instead of complaining first.
9. Keep up with Torah reading and start working on text with each child.
10. BIG ONE - Buy only things made locally or in the U.S.! First I will look to buy it used, then new and if not available, I will go without it or make it.
11. Sew more of our clothes from my hoard of fabric.
12. Get serious about saving. Set aside 10% for festivals and birthdays, etc.
13. Finish projects that are stored in my sewing room. Give or use those that I am able to, sell the rest on Etsy.
14. When I get excited about a worship song that I have heard or have been stuck on, don't hesitate so much and go share it! This may mean giving myself a challenge of singing once every few months or even *gulp* playing the piano in public.
15. Get my passport and my hunting license!
While typing this up and looking around the house to help me remember all the things that have been on my mind, it was difficult not to add projects that are house related. I will post a sort of list on our other blog soon- ourirshmanor.blogspot.com- so you can peek at that and see what else is going on around here. I also have another list going of some of my goals for this decade -from 30 to 40. I am hoping to share that at some point, maybe closer to my birthday.
This list is pretty short, and I think they are fairly practical goals. Do you have a list? Do you make resolutions? I encourage you to, at the very least, look back over the past year and see what has been accomplished! Sometimes we don't see God at work until we look over our shoulder and see where He has been, walking before us all the way.
Before I start the resolutions for the new year, I want to review what has been accomplished in my life. Not necessarily by me but for me with God's guidance and mercy:
I have learned to go to bed at a decent hour so that I can be ready for the next day. This has taken years for me to learn and only came when the needs of this last baby demanded it.
I made it to 7 months of nursing! That beats the last record for me :)
We saved up and bought a house!
I have continued my journey in better nutrition for my family and have found a happy medium, though the journey is not over.
I have learned to say "No" to too many extra, outside the home things that take me away from my duties and peace here.
I am learning to embrace my physical appearance, thanks to the blessing of having a husband who asked me not to diet anymore. I love that man! I think he might like me too....
We gave more.
I have worked hard at loving those I may not like. I know I have more of me to submit to the Lord in that, more parts of my heart that need to be repaired.
I have looked hard at my motivations for doing things, be they vain or righteous.
I know there are so many more that I am over looking or forgetting completely. Sadly, I did not get my hunting license or passport, but....
On to the new years resolutions! These are in random order, and I will probably add to the list since I have only thought of a few things to work on this year. Remodeling a house and having a baby sure take up the energy I would normally have for overhauling other areas of my life!
1. Get back on track for homeschool. Holiday break is over, starting tomorrow!
2. Stop drinking coffee- it makes me grouchy and irritable and its bad for the baby. Yes, even though it is half caff! (Day 2 -So far, so good with this one. I put away the coffee today and I will put away the pot tomorrow) Coffee will be a fun treat on occasion instead of a crutch!
3. Do TTapp exercises 3 times a week.
4. Spend more time with each child individually. Mommy day once a month?
5. Lose my temper less and speak more gently to those around me, specifically my children and husband!
6. Love and praise my family more.
7. Rest more! I discovered, while sick the last 2 weeks, that I need more rest than I thought previously. Delegate chores that stress to other people when possible.
8. Find solutions instead of complaining first.
9. Keep up with Torah reading and start working on text with each child.
10. BIG ONE - Buy only things made locally or in the U.S.! First I will look to buy it used, then new and if not available, I will go without it or make it.
11. Sew more of our clothes from my hoard of fabric.
12. Get serious about saving. Set aside 10% for festivals and birthdays, etc.
13. Finish projects that are stored in my sewing room. Give or use those that I am able to, sell the rest on Etsy.
14. When I get excited about a worship song that I have heard or have been stuck on, don't hesitate so much and go share it! This may mean giving myself a challenge of singing once every few months or even *gulp* playing the piano in public.
15. Get my passport and my hunting license!
While typing this up and looking around the house to help me remember all the things that have been on my mind, it was difficult not to add projects that are house related. I will post a sort of list on our other blog soon- ourirshmanor.blogspot.com- so you can peek at that and see what else is going on around here. I also have another list going of some of my goals for this decade -from 30 to 40. I am hoping to share that at some point, maybe closer to my birthday.
This list is pretty short, and I think they are fairly practical goals. Do you have a list? Do you make resolutions? I encourage you to, at the very least, look back over the past year and see what has been accomplished! Sometimes we don't see God at work until we look over our shoulder and see where He has been, walking before us all the way.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Guiltmas, Moremas, Stuffmas?
Yay! Christmas is over! Don't get me wrong, it was wonderful, but I am so glad that it is over and we can get past the commercials and advertisements around every corner! I'm already looking toward the new year and planning my resolutions (next post?).
I did end up decorating, but wasn't finished until about 3 days before Christmas. It helped with my holiday funk I was in. I was also overruled by my husband - we ended up with a tree and stockings. It was okay and since our focus was on GIVING instead of getting, Christmas was different. The boys made gifts with me for each of their siblings and daddy. And then each made a cookie to put in stockings. I purchased some bags of peppermint sticks and stuffed satsuma oranges (a tradition in my family) into their stockings as well. Daddy even went all out and made his gift for me, a wooden shelf for my bathroom! It was a nice, peaceful holiday.
Where the guilt and excess come in is the gifts from other people! We love our family and are thankful that they want to bless our children with gifts, but it was a lot this year! One set of grandparents dropped of a pile of presents that exceeded any other Christmas before, another set sent Amazon gift cards. Combine that with the gift cards from aunts and uncles and other assorted relatives, our children were rolling in gifts and dough! So much for a modest holiday.
Now, I can choose to look at this as God blessing our children for sharing their Christmas money with those in need (we didn't tell anyone in our family about that) or I can chalk it up to generosity. Either way, it was a lot of money and stuff!
And what does a responsible parent do with these gift cards? Save it up and persuade the children to really think about what they can combine the money for, hoping they will choose to spend it on something for their bedroom or home? Encourage them to use it gradually throughout the year? No, I let them spend the Amazon gift cards on toys! Lots of toys! After all, that is what the money was intended for, wasn't it?
At about midnight last night, long after the last "order it" button had been pushed at Amazon, I started to regret my decision to indulge my children. I let them choose and shop because the gift wasn't from me, it was from someone else who wanted the kids to spend it on fun stuff. But do I have to do what is expected? I am the parent, am I not? Letting them have everything they could want cannot possibly be good for them in the long run! I was irritated enough (with my own overindulgence) that I hopped back online and almost canceled their orders.... until I realized that these were gift cards and there is not much else that can be done with them. If they had not bought toys, they would have bought something else that either I had coerced them into buying (and they would not enjoy or appreciate) or something that I would not approve of. Either way, the gift cards would be spent. I can't save them up in a bank account, the will not accrue interest, the things they purchase will always be extra because it is just that - a gift, not a necessity. A gift is meant to be extra, to be special and a luxury, right? The orders stayed.
I will insist on "Thank You" cards from each of my children to the gift giver.
My husband's suggestion for next year is to let each child choose one thing, then spend the rest on things that they may need throughout the year or discuss a big purchase to be made that will be a communal gift for them. That cash they received is going in a bank account! This situation, combined with our desire to be givers at the time of year, has given me a lot to think about when it comes to birthdays and gifts we give to our children throughout the year. I'll talk more about that in my new year post :)
Anyway, hope your Christmas was peaceful, meaning full and above all, an abundant blessing!
I did end up decorating, but wasn't finished until about 3 days before Christmas. It helped with my holiday funk I was in. I was also overruled by my husband - we ended up with a tree and stockings. It was okay and since our focus was on GIVING instead of getting, Christmas was different. The boys made gifts with me for each of their siblings and daddy. And then each made a cookie to put in stockings. I purchased some bags of peppermint sticks and stuffed satsuma oranges (a tradition in my family) into their stockings as well. Daddy even went all out and made his gift for me, a wooden shelf for my bathroom! It was a nice, peaceful holiday.
Where the guilt and excess come in is the gifts from other people! We love our family and are thankful that they want to bless our children with gifts, but it was a lot this year! One set of grandparents dropped of a pile of presents that exceeded any other Christmas before, another set sent Amazon gift cards. Combine that with the gift cards from aunts and uncles and other assorted relatives, our children were rolling in gifts and dough! So much for a modest holiday.
Now, I can choose to look at this as God blessing our children for sharing their Christmas money with those in need (we didn't tell anyone in our family about that) or I can chalk it up to generosity. Either way, it was a lot of money and stuff!
And what does a responsible parent do with these gift cards? Save it up and persuade the children to really think about what they can combine the money for, hoping they will choose to spend it on something for their bedroom or home? Encourage them to use it gradually throughout the year? No, I let them spend the Amazon gift cards on toys! Lots of toys! After all, that is what the money was intended for, wasn't it?
At about midnight last night, long after the last "order it" button had been pushed at Amazon, I started to regret my decision to indulge my children. I let them choose and shop because the gift wasn't from me, it was from someone else who wanted the kids to spend it on fun stuff. But do I have to do what is expected? I am the parent, am I not? Letting them have everything they could want cannot possibly be good for them in the long run! I was irritated enough (with my own overindulgence) that I hopped back online and almost canceled their orders.... until I realized that these were gift cards and there is not much else that can be done with them. If they had not bought toys, they would have bought something else that either I had coerced them into buying (and they would not enjoy or appreciate) or something that I would not approve of. Either way, the gift cards would be spent. I can't save them up in a bank account, the will not accrue interest, the things they purchase will always be extra because it is just that - a gift, not a necessity. A gift is meant to be extra, to be special and a luxury, right? The orders stayed.
I will insist on "Thank You" cards from each of my children to the gift giver.
My husband's suggestion for next year is to let each child choose one thing, then spend the rest on things that they may need throughout the year or discuss a big purchase to be made that will be a communal gift for them. That cash they received is going in a bank account! This situation, combined with our desire to be givers at the time of year, has given me a lot to think about when it comes to birthdays and gifts we give to our children throughout the year. I'll talk more about that in my new year post :)
Anyway, hope your Christmas was peaceful, meaning full and above all, an abundant blessing!
Friday, December 10, 2010
Merry Messiahmas!
Hanukkah has come and gone. Part of me is sad and part of me is relieved that there are no more nights with fried food and gifts! I know that we started some really good traditions this year with our "8 lights, 8 lessons" and I am excited to see what next year brings in both inspiration and learning. I'm not really sure if I am ready for Christmas now. Maybe the next 2 weeks will afford me a break and I will get my energy (vigor, zest, joy) for celebrating back!
I did end up decorating with cedar garlands and I love it, even if they didn't last all that long and now I want to replace them all. I am a little disappointed that most of my white lights needed fuses changed and so I didn't bother to haggle with them to get them up. And I did decorate our front porch a little. It sounds like my husband really wants to keep doing a Christmas tree, so this afternoon we will dig the plastic one out and decorate it. I'm glad that he is taking an interest in the holidays. That is totally not his style! I have been wavering on the tree decision for a while and its good to have him make a call on this one. I've also decided that while we don't teach our kids that Santa is real and bring them gifts, we will let them watch most holiday movies, since it is about the same as letting them watch Narnia; both are stories about imaginary characters, but our kids seem to understand that these things are not real, just fun. That has helped me ease up on the "Christmas Gestapo" role that I was falling into!
We've also come up with a plan for Christmas day. We gave our Christmas money to World Vision this year, which the children are proud of and feel good knowing that they helped so many people. They know that means no gifts on Christmas and were slightly disappointed about that, but they were being troopers and keeping a stiff upper lip about it. Then I realized that Christmas doesn't have to cost us more, it can be free. We can help others and still give to each other. I have a sewing room full of craft materials and fabric and paints - there is no reason why we can't make something!
I am really proud of the boys and their willingness to focus on giving this year. They have such big hearts, if you can get them away from video games and Star Wars for a moment! Each boy took a moment with me to peruse Design Mom's blog for inspiration. I have tons of craft books, but all are packed and these projects have all been done for a very small amount or nothing, tested by her own children and reviewed by the recipients :) Over the next couple weeks, I will spend an afternoon (while the baby is napping) with each boy, working on their gifts for their family. I'll post pictures when we are done. The only one not going along with this plan is Dad, but we will excuse him since I don't think there is an arts-&-crafts bone in his body!
What are your plans for the holiday season? Have you seen this list posted in the Anchorage Daily News? Its worth printing up and posting on the fridge to bust the winter blahs! Merry Christmas!
I did end up decorating with cedar garlands and I love it, even if they didn't last all that long and now I want to replace them all. I am a little disappointed that most of my white lights needed fuses changed and so I didn't bother to haggle with them to get them up. And I did decorate our front porch a little. It sounds like my husband really wants to keep doing a Christmas tree, so this afternoon we will dig the plastic one out and decorate it. I'm glad that he is taking an interest in the holidays. That is totally not his style! I have been wavering on the tree decision for a while and its good to have him make a call on this one. I've also decided that while we don't teach our kids that Santa is real and bring them gifts, we will let them watch most holiday movies, since it is about the same as letting them watch Narnia; both are stories about imaginary characters, but our kids seem to understand that these things are not real, just fun. That has helped me ease up on the "Christmas Gestapo" role that I was falling into!
We've also come up with a plan for Christmas day. We gave our Christmas money to World Vision this year, which the children are proud of and feel good knowing that they helped so many people. They know that means no gifts on Christmas and were slightly disappointed about that, but they were being troopers and keeping a stiff upper lip about it. Then I realized that Christmas doesn't have to cost us more, it can be free. We can help others and still give to each other. I have a sewing room full of craft materials and fabric and paints - there is no reason why we can't make something!
I am really proud of the boys and their willingness to focus on giving this year. They have such big hearts, if you can get them away from video games and Star Wars for a moment! Each boy took a moment with me to peruse Design Mom's blog for inspiration. I have tons of craft books, but all are packed and these projects have all been done for a very small amount or nothing, tested by her own children and reviewed by the recipients :) Over the next couple weeks, I will spend an afternoon (while the baby is napping) with each boy, working on their gifts for their family. I'll post pictures when we are done. The only one not going along with this plan is Dad, but we will excuse him since I don't think there is an arts-&-crafts bone in his body!
What are your plans for the holiday season? Have you seen this list posted in the Anchorage Daily News? Its worth printing up and posting on the fridge to bust the winter blahs! Merry Christmas!
Saturday, November 27, 2010
The deadline
It looks like I won't be completing my notebook for the challenge. I'm a little disappointed with myself, but at least it got me drawing again. I can say it helped waken my desire to create again. Maybe I will continue working on it and magically have it done before the January 15 postal deadline. Maybe not.
*shrug* I can't say I tried all that hard. When is it ever a good time to do this kind of thing? Are my days of being able to sit down and finish a project (or start one for that matter) over? I don't seem to have time to sew, yet have a room full of fabrics and patterns and ideas in sketchbooks. I don't have time to paint, but have buckets of bottles, cups of brushes and stacks of canvas. I need to create! This is something that I long for but never seem to have time to do.
I drag my kids everywhere with me - the doctor, the store, the theater. Perhaps there will come a day when my office will be organized and I can bring my children in with me. The sketchbook will be waiting for me.
*shrug* I can't say I tried all that hard. When is it ever a good time to do this kind of thing? Are my days of being able to sit down and finish a project (or start one for that matter) over? I don't seem to have time to sew, yet have a room full of fabrics and patterns and ideas in sketchbooks. I don't have time to paint, but have buckets of bottles, cups of brushes and stacks of canvas. I need to create! This is something that I long for but never seem to have time to do.
I drag my kids everywhere with me - the doctor, the store, the theater. Perhaps there will come a day when my office will be organized and I can bring my children in with me. The sketchbook will be waiting for me.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Giving
Last week, after my last post, I pulled out the World Vision Catalog that has been sitting on my desk for.. what seems like months, but is probably only 1. I reminded each child that we were not going to be celebrating Christmas like we have before. I encouraged each one to pick out gifts for another child, somewhere across the world, who goes without most everything that our family has. Some kids live in huts, some work all day for pennies. Some are orphaned or are living with sick and dying family members, maybe their mother or their little brother. My 3 oldest boys looked through the catalog for a few minutes and then they started calling out things they wanted to get for other kids. "Soccer balls so they can have fun!" "Clean water, mom. That's what I want to give" It was really moving to hear my children, who are like so many of us and think about themselves 99% of the time, choosing to give instead of have more.
Our little order form is filled out and waiting for me to glean the money from savings accounts and pay checks over the next weeks. My hope burgeoned that this year, we would be the light to someone else, showing them who Messiah is by giving instead of asking, yet again, for more. I slipped the form under my laptop, waiting for a money order or a moment to order online. I was so excited to have my children on board with refocusing our holiday!
And then the little whispers of doubt started to creep in..... Am I cheating my kids? Will they forgive me when Christmas comes without presents for them? Should I get them one thing? Should I only take the first step this year, phasing out Christmas in exchange for Hanukkah? I didn't see how I could honor God by giving to His son, and still pursue all the worldy practices of this holiday.
And then an answer to the ache in my heart, my friend shared a post from another family that has been doing the same thing, giving instead of getting, for 10 years now! I cried for quite a while after reading this post. It was a comfort and an affirmation to me.
As we approach Hanukkah, I prepare myself for some big teaching moments. I don't plan to give our children lavish gifts each day of the feast, but instead, we will have lessons centered on a theme for the day. Some days, they will receive a gift; other days, they will give a gift or perform an act of charity. Keep praying for us, that each one of us in our family will be transformed into Messiah's image during this season.
Our little order form is filled out and waiting for me to glean the money from savings accounts and pay checks over the next weeks. My hope burgeoned that this year, we would be the light to someone else, showing them who Messiah is by giving instead of asking, yet again, for more. I slipped the form under my laptop, waiting for a money order or a moment to order online. I was so excited to have my children on board with refocusing our holiday!
And then the little whispers of doubt started to creep in..... Am I cheating my kids? Will they forgive me when Christmas comes without presents for them? Should I get them one thing? Should I only take the first step this year, phasing out Christmas in exchange for Hanukkah? I didn't see how I could honor God by giving to His son, and still pursue all the worldy practices of this holiday.
And then an answer to the ache in my heart, my friend shared a post from another family that has been doing the same thing, giving instead of getting, for 10 years now! I cried for quite a while after reading this post. It was a comfort and an affirmation to me.
As we approach Hanukkah, I prepare myself for some big teaching moments. I don't plan to give our children lavish gifts each day of the feast, but instead, we will have lessons centered on a theme for the day. Some days, they will receive a gift; other days, they will give a gift or perform an act of charity. Keep praying for us, that each one of us in our family will be transformed into Messiah's image during this season.
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