I am starting to reap the benefits of cutting out everything and focusing on home life! The house is more peaceful, the kids are more willing to do school work, the house is cleaner and we have more time for family fun. I have a few outside things, but they are limited to a Saturday church group and I finally have time to get more involved in my community as a member of a non-profit support group! Scheduling our week has helped make this possible!
Every morning after breakfast, the kids do the dishes and then we have school work time from 10-12 on days that we are home. Our days are laid out to help me focus on specific things because I get very overwhelmed with all the things that need to be done, especially in a house that is still in mid remodel! Maybe it would help if I shared how we are doing things right now...
Our week looks like this:
Yard and Garden - Sunday. This includes working on cars, mowing, gardening, working on the chicken coop, and working on outside projects like the shed. My husband will gladly cook breakfast or watch babies on this day so I can spend time painting or building. I try to prep food for my husband's lunches for the week.
Office Day - Monday. I check all emails, respond to messages, blog, make phone calls, order food or items online, print and copy, and do paperwork for the non-profit. It is also a day for me to clear junk mail off all the flat surfaces, plan a menu for the week, and start lining out Town Day.
Laundry Day - Tuesday. Obviously, we wash laundry. Every one gets their laundry done and we fold and put everything away (Yes, Mom, it is easier if you fold as it comes out of the dryer). I have used this day to switch out coats and shoes for the season, or bring out the next size of clothing for a child that has grown and put the old ones away. I DO NOT wash diapers on this day! It ties up to much time and prevents me from getting all the laundry done. They can be done any other day. Now that we are on top of the laundry, I hope to use the baby's afternoon nap time for sewing. This is a good day for kids to get baths and showers.
Cleaning Day -Wednesday. I know, lots of families do cleaning day on Friday. They might call it "Preparation Day". I find that I am an emotional wreck on Friday if we do all the cleaning on that day and we are FAR less likely to have dinner ready, which means I order in. No one wants a yelling, angry Mama when we are lighting the candles for Shabbat! So we clean Wednesday. We dust and vacuum, clean bathrooms and mop. If we don't get anything done in the kitchen beyond the dishes, I don't sweat it, since I will tackle that on Kitchen Day. The only reason the house stays remotely clean for Shabbat is because Thursday is....
Town Day!- Thursday. Our town day revolves around the lessons we are taking. Right now it is gymnastics. Before this it was Lego club and Town Day was on a different day. This is when I run errands. We might stop to visit people, mail letters and Netflix videos, buy eggs and milk, refill honey jars, doctor appointments, anything that requires driving. I try to limit it to this day. It works more than it doesn't.
Kitchen Day - Friday. I love cooking but I also love getting a break on Shabbat. I find it difficult to get a break on Shabbat if there is not enough food already prepared in the fridge. I use Friday to clean my kitchen, make bread, start or finish stock, start a meal in the crock pot, clean out the fridge, restock items. This is a good day for kids to get baths or showers. I try to have at least an extra dinner and breakfast ready for the next day. Sometimes I overbook myself and end up using Friday to play catch up everywhere or my husband has the day off and takes the older kids out to play, leaving me to watch toddlers and babies, in which case nothing really happens. And that is okay. Sometimes. I have learned the most important things I can do before Shabbat is a) make sure all the dishes are clean and the dishwasher is empty; b) have both diaper pails empty and all the diapers cleaned and c) wash all the hand towels and napkins. I throw a tablecloth on the table, even if we are having pizza, and that helps to set the tone for Shabbat.
Shabbat! - Everyone loads their own dishes after dinner and for the next day and on Saturday night, we run it so dishes are ready to be put away and we are back to work on Sunday! I might hand wash large bowls or pans, but I try to do them as we dirty them. And sometimes they just stay there for Sunday. It is important to take the tablecloth off the table after the kids go to bed that night. If it is still on for Sunday breakfast, we are all slower to get on with our day.
This is what works for us. It is super regimented, I know. Its important to realize that I don't do ALL of these things in one day. These are just things that I do on that day if they need to be done. For example: Haircuts? I try to do that on Cleaning Day, since the bathroom will need to be mopped afterwards. If I don't get to something, it is good to know I will have an appropriate time to schedule it in next week. Sometimes that works, and sometimes I just have to let it go because I can get really hung up on the things I DIDN'T get to and it prevents me from moving on with my day. I also tend to overlook the accomplishment of what I DID. I think it is important to find what works for you and keep tweaking it.
I still don't have time for any of my hobbies, but I have time for taking care of myself. I no longer have to fight to get a shower or take a bath. I've started a new moon spa time for myself! My day is packed, but I even squeeze in exercise. Getting up before the kids has helped a lot. If I get up at 6, I have an hour to check emails and have a cup of coffee while it is quiet. That goes a long way toward me being a more peaceful parent for the day.
I also have more time for my husband. If I'm up early, I can make lunch and breakfast for him. I am done with chores before dinner and can cuddle on the couch with him after babies go to bed instead of staying up to do laundry or fretting about something that is still wait to be attended to. I think he likes having more time with a wife that is not so tired :)
Last of all, I am still nursing our baby! She is 11 months old and we nurse several times a day still, without struggling to keep my supply up. That has been an enormous blessing and I will miss that time when she decides to wean.
I am thankful that we have stayed home and found a way to make our family and household run more smoothly. It is a sacrifice for me to give up all of the extra activities, but I would rather sacrifice my time than sacrifice my family. All the projects that I want to do will still be there later. My children won't. I want to encourage you to find a schedule. A rhythm. Its flexible because its structured. Its not perfect, but its working. I have been blessed by this and I hope you will be as well.
